Away we go

Yeah, it's been awhile.  A TON of things have happened in the last six weeks and I guess I just wanted to take the time to process everything.  :)

We're moving.  Ok, so that's a little anti-climactic.  :)

We're moving to Fort Bragg, North Carolina in just one month.  Like exactly a month from today, I'll be cleaning up the empty house before we leave town.  It seems surreal.  I feel like we JUST got to Frederick.  We've been here now 27 months.  I'm not ready to leave.  I love the city, I love Maryland and I LOVE LOVE LOVE my friends.  I'm more than sad to leave.  :(

But this is the life.  The life we chose and the life we live.  And now it's time to go.  Adam is being offered a job some people dream about...maybe lots of people dream about...and as his wife, I told him many years ago that wherever the Army should take him (provided we could come, too), then we'd be there.  So to Fort Bragg we go.

There are some great things about moving.  I LOVE house hunting.  I love the new, the exciting, the unknown.  I'm excited to be at a "real" army post again.  Ft. Detrick is VERY small.  Coming from Ft. Campbell (the 5th largest Army installation stateside) to Ft. Detrick was such an adjustment.  Now we're headed back to a major post, Bragg being the third largest CONUS post, so that's pretty exciting.  (*Note: So I tried to verify my post size sources and it seems it might be inaccurate, but no one reads my blog so I really don't care.)  It's fun to see what new things we can get into as a family.  We've been to Baltimore, to DC (several times), to Philadelphia, to New York City, to camping in West Virginia, camping in MD, visiting VA, driving through DE.  We've done a lot while we've been here, so I guess it's time to move on.

But I'm pretty sure part of my heart will always be in Frederick.  Especially as long as my Maryland besties are still here.

Anyway, here's to more blogging in the future....some exciting things coming up soon.  :)

Not much of an update!

So last week was a super busy blur so I wasn't able to blog.  Adam's outta town this week, so that should definitely give me a chance to get some blogging done!! :)

I updated my last post with my goal accomplishments.  I thought I did a lot better than I had. :(  Oops.

I'm working on a goal list so I'll update when I can.  In the meantime, I've got laundry to do, dinner to start, and school stuff to print out for the boys.  :)

I'll be back....

It's goal time!

Well, we went.  Now we're home.  :)  It was a fun, happy, busy ten days.  It went by too fast and I hate that it's over, but I'm kinda happy to be home.  I wish our house was A LOT closer to Ohio, then I could have the best of both worlds.

Back to life.

This week's Goal List:

Family/Mothering Goals:
1.  Read Squanto to the boys.
2.  Work on fossil science project.
3.  Read Veggie Tale Devotional on Wednesday night.

Personal Goals:
4.  Read Taming the Spirited Child.
5.  In bed every night by midnight and up everyday at eight.
6.  Exercise.  (this is a very specific goal, but I'll just generalize it here)

Home Management Goals:
7.  Finish all laundry and clean all the bedrooms.
8.  Make a trip to Goodwill to donate stuff.

Craft Goals:
9.  Finish niece's baby blanket.
10.  Work birthday party planning.

I'd be thrilled to cross lots of these things off of my list by Sunday.  Adam leaves then for a week long business trip so I'm hoping to get some stuff worked on while he's here.  :)

Now, time to adios the internet and get to work.

All thumbs today. :(

I'm really starting to think I'm not nearly as crafty as I think I am.  I've been working on projects all day....nothing has turned out right.  :(

Sigh.

Ohmygeez, so very much to do.

Lots to do, so much to do, TONS to do.

We leave for Ohio on Thursday.  Thursday very early morning to be exact.  In the time before we leave, these are the things I have to get done:

Finish all 32 crochet squares for my twinkies baby blankets.  I've got 16 1/2 done.  Lots more to do.  After the squares are done, I've got to sew them all together and then add a border.  I can piece them together in Ohio and border them in Ohio, but I've GOT to get them crocheted BEFORE we leave.

Make 2 baby hats and 2 pairs of baby booties.  (Seriously, Luke and Sarah, one baby at a time would have been a lot easier on Aunt Nicole's craftiness.)

Get my boys Halloween costumes finished up.  Mario and Luigi need gloves, buttons, and mustaches. Jax needs a whole costume.  :(  He was Pauly D (from the Jersey Shore) for the Halloween party, but I don't think that is going to work for this weekend...especially since we cut his hair and we can't blow it out anymore.

Make Joyce her birthday presents.  I'm making a ruffle pillow and a color block scarf.  I'm also making a scarf for myself!  :)  These things shoulda been done already, but when talking to me, you know that I'm so very last minute.  I love the pressure apparently.  I sure hope that's something I can get better at.  :(

Finish planning Sarah's baby shower.  Lots of things will be done when we get to Ohio so I don't have to travel with completed decorations (and risk them getting ruined).  I think my bestie is coming over on Friday night to help me be crafty.  We need to work on games, favors, and decor.  Suddenly this shower that I've been planning for months just got very overwhelming.  :)

Pack for a ten day trip to Ohio.  Lots of cold weather means lots of layers...which take up way more room in the van.  Boo.

Clean the house.

Work on some pretty big school projects with Adisson.

I can do this.  I just need to reallllllly prioritize my time the best way possible.  Oh and Adam's birthday is tomorrow and we'll be doing a little party here at home that I'll need to make a cake for and decorate the house.  It's overwhelming to be so very busy with so many projects but I LOVE making things and I really LOVE making things for people I love.  Anyway, gotta get to work.  :)

Oh yeah.....

Last night I walked/jogged two miles without stopping!  :)  It wasn't super fast (just over thirty minutes) but I did it!  Hillary and I did it!!  First we did some weight training, then the treadmills, then some treadclimber thing that we super hate, then a mile on the recumbent bike.  Amazing and wonderful.  That's how it feels to be doing something!!  Signing up for our first 5k for next weekend, too!  :)

Lots of stuff to do today, like everyday, but I'm doing it.  I'm doing something, getting somewhere.

I do need to come up with costumes for Hillary's Halloween party this weekend.  Sadly, I've put on nearly 20 pounds since last Halloween so I can't wear any of my old costumes.  :(  It's nice to be healthy, it's nice to not be sick all the time, it's a miracle (literally) that I've only had one infection this year and have been healthy continuously for the last 9 months (for the first time EVER in my ENTIRE life!), but the weight gain is hard for me to accept.  I've never been at this weight not being pregnant.  I'm just a few pounds away from how much I weighed the day I gave birth to Adisson.  And it's a hard pill to swallow.  :(

But I'm doing something.  I'm working out.  I've been to the gym twice this week and while that may not be an incredible feat for some, it is for me.  And I love it!!

The energizer bunny has nothing on me.... :)

So, I'm working hard on getting laundry done. Oh my goodness.  Even for one night of camping, we have so much stuff that needs washed.  When I'm doing all the laundry, it makes me want to limit everyone to five outfits total! :)

We're really busy around here, at least I am anyway, and there's lots of things that need to be done this afternoon and evening.  We've got lots of school work to catch up on.  When Daddy is off work, we seem to get less done and he had a long weekend and yesterday I had an appointment that took all afternoon so we're pretty behind.  This afternoon we'll be catching up.

We've also got lots of cleaning to get done.  I feel like everyone wants to have a clean and tidy house, but I'm the one that supposed to do everything.  I get that, mostly.  I'm the mom, I should be running this ship.  But I'm also the meal planner, the grocery getter, the homeschool mom, the den leader, the soccer fan, the workout partner, the craft queen, the party planner, the toddler tamer, the bill payer, the budget buster, the husband supporter and the woman with an autoimmune disease.  I'm tired.  And I need help from the boys that live here.

Tonight will be a cleaning night since no one has Jiu-Jitsu, soccer, scouts, or anything else to keep us occupied.  Bedrooms and bathrooms will all be clean before everyone goes to bed.  I haven't told the boys that yet so I'm sure I'll be met with groans from all four of them when I break the news.  In the meantime, I have an hour to clean the basement...maybe I can get a room or two done before lunch and then school.

I hang out in a No Lunk Zone!

Yesterday we were so busy cleaning out the garage.  It gone done.  It also made me realize that I'm not sure if I can pack up our whole house and move it to Ohio when Adam leaves for a year.  We have A LOT of stuff, even though I feel like I'm constantly getting rid of things.

LAST WEEKS GOALS
Family/Mothering Goals
1.  Finish reading Mouse and the Motorcycle aloud to the boys.
2.  Work with the boys on how to correctly clean each of their bathrooms.
3.  Start our Veggie Tales devotional book.

Personal Goals:
4.  Exercise 15-20 minutes three times this week (this is my trying to implement a workout schedule by starting slowly!)
5.  Read How to be a Great Wife Even Though You Homeschool and Five Simple Ways to Grow a Great Family.
6.  Start working on Joyce's birthday present (her birthday was yesterday, but I won't be seeing her until later this month.  This is kind of a big project so I need to get started now).
7.  Work on two squares a day for the twins blankets (need 32 total).
8.  Get my toddler busy bag craft completed and mailed by 10/7.

Home Management Goals:
9.  Implement planned meal schedule everyday this week.
10.  Go through all four bedrooms to rid of unwanted items (donate to Goodwill).

Wow.  That was a bust.  :)  There are things on the list that I worked on, just didn't complete.  I'll try again.


THIS WEEK'S GOALS
Family/Mothering Goals:
1.  Finish The Mouse and the Motorcycle (we're only two chapters away from being done!)
2.  Continue Veggie Tales Devotional (went over VERY well last week!)
3.  Help the boys get their rooms decluttered and cleaned.


Personal Goals:
4.  Join Planet Fitness and work out three times this week (preferably with Hillary!)
5.  Finish reading How to be a Great Wife Even Though You Homeschool and Taming the Spirited Child.
6.  Be in bed every night BY midnight.


Crafting Goals:
7.  Finish up enough squares for one baby blanket this week (16 for each one).
8.  Start Joyce's gift.


Home Goals:
9.  Work on better meal planning and better meal implementation.
10.  Get all the laundry done (we were camping over the weekend, which means, several sets of sheets, sleeping bags, blankets and clothes all need washed...along with everything else that I would have to wash anyway).




In a good effort on my goals, last night Hillary and I joined Planet Fitness and worked out last night.  It was awesome!  We're also signing up to run a 5K in less than two weeks!!  Can't wait!


In the meantime, I've got to get things done today before my doctor's appointment this afternoon (to get enrolled in the army's special needs program, which my autoimmune disorder qualifies me for, something I should have done a YEAR ago!! :)

Whew...I'm exhausted.

We were so busy this weekend!  We headed to Gambrill State Park for some camping on Friday night.  We had such a great time, despite the FRIGID weather overnight, but I couldn't help but think that this was the last time the boys would be camping with their Dad for a long time.  It's sad to think we won't be able to go camping next year because there's no way I'm taking them by myself!  

We roasted hot dogs, made s'mores, had a fire (of course) and played around.  We got up early on Saturday morning to go to Adisson's soccer game.  My awesome friend Hillary and her family showed up to watch the game (seriously, one of the coolest things ever...I love it when people love my boys!).  Adisson played SO WELL!  He is a great defender and did really well helping out the goalie.  I feel bad that I was so nervous to put him in the older league because I was worried his skills wouldn't be on par with the other kids. I was wrong.  

We headed back out to the campsite for lunch and to hang out for a few hours.  Tore our site down.  Loaded everything into the van.  Came home, unloaded the van, reloaded the van with suitcases and toys, showered and headed to DC.  Went to pick up Adam's race packet, had dinner, checked in to the Hampton and got settled in before Adam's race.

He ran a great time today for the ATM.  Just over an hour, twenty seven minutes.  Placed in the top 25%.  It was sad that my Dad couldn't be there to run with him like last year, but he's off training up to be deployed.  :(  Between my Dad and Adam both being gone at the same time, I think I might have a meltdown next year. :)

We had a nice time in DC, had a really great weekend and Adam and I are tired and worn out!  The kids, however, are still going full speed ahead!  Tomorrow, we've got the very mundane, mind numbing task of cleaning out the garage.  Personally, I want everything to go, but that won't happen.  We'll see what I can get rid of between selling on craigslist, donating, and pawning off to my friends.  :)

I'll update my goal progress and my new goals for the week tomorrow.  :)

Where did I put that cape??

Only a little bit at a time.  That's how you get anywhere.  Well, that's how I get anywhere.

Before Adam's second tour to Iraq, I was on the phone with my Dad in complete despair.  How on earth can I do this again?  With TWO kids this time?  This was his third year of being gone in just under four years.  I couldn't believe we were doing this again.  AGAIN.  Dad told me that I can only eat an elephant one bite at a time.  I think it's his old age...eventually wisdom just has to catch up to you! :)  (I know it's not his own personal quote, but it didn't mean any less to me than if it were.)

But he's right.  I can't conquer the world in a day, rid my house of every worthless possession overnight, or deal with a yearlong absence of my husband quicker than one day at a time.  I can only do what I can do.

I'm not superwoman.  I'm not an overachiever.  Some days the only thing I can achieve is getting out of bed.

But I am strong enough.  I'm strong enough to do whatever I need to do.  As a wife, as a mother, and as the woman I'm hell bent on being.

So yes, I'm overwhelmed.  Yes, in some regards I may have possibly bitten off more than I can chew.  But at the end of the day, no one can love my boys like I do and if something needs done, for the sake of my children, for the sake of my family, for the sake of myself, I'll get it done.  Late, but I'll get it done.

So...off to find me an elephant.

Just a drop of water in an endless sea....

So tired.  Treatment went well today, even though my lovely idiotic doctor told me I need to stop gaining weight.  No kidding?!?  I certainly am not TRYING to gain weight.  It also makes me feel like I'm right when I look in the mirror and see a large person.  Ugh....anyway

Then there was soccer practice that ran so late we had to pull Adi off the field to make it to Scouts.  Then we get to Scouts and the ONE other family in our den didn't show up.

Sigh.

Also, I feel like no matter how very hard I'm trying to do better...at anything, at everything, it seriously isn't happening.  It's like I take so many steps forward and then several MILES backwards.  As far as I know right now, the boys and I will be moving into a MUCH smaller house in five months.  Which means I have to get rid of LOTS and LOTS of stuff.  But every time I enter a room, I just get overwhelmed with all of it and leave.  So nothing gets done.

I feel so overwhelmed, so exasperated and like I'm literally in the middle of the ocean, trying to keep my head above water.....and it's pulling me under faster than I can catch my breath.  How can finding peace and balance be such an exhausting journey?

Anyway, off to crochet...at least that will calm me down.  :)

My Weekly Goals....oh dear

Ok, so while I'm reading on the trek to a more minimalist lifestyle, I'm realizing that my time management is completely nonexistent.  I can be so organized and so very messy at the same time because I don't organize my time/schedule or plan my day out well.  I have the best intentions.... :)

So I'm reading on Money Saving Mom about her weekly goals.  She posts them, so I figured I'd do the same.  It's funny that I'm so random on this blog.  It's never something I intended for many people to read, just a way to keep in touch with family while I'm away and/or with Adam while he's not with us.  And I'm pretty sure my family is aware of my randomness and loves me anyway.  :)

My goals for this week are as follows:
(I'm following MSM's goal list set up but could definitely tweak it to my own needs if this doesn't work)

Family/Mothering Goals
1.  Finish reading Mouse and the Motorcycle aloud to the boys.
2.  Work with the boys on how to correctly clean each of their bathrooms.
3.  Start our Veggie Tales devotional book.

Personal Goals:
4.  Exercise 15-20 minutes three times this week (this is my trying to implement a workout schedule by starting slowly!)
5.  Read How to be a Great Wife Even Though You Homeschool and Five Simple Ways to Grow a Great Family.
6.  Start working on Joyce's birthday present (her birthday was yesterday, but I won't be seeing her until later this month.  This is kind of a big project so I need to get started now).
7.  Work on two squares a day for the twins blankets (need 32 total).
8.  Get my toddler busy bag craft completed and mailed by 10/7.

Home Management Goals:
9.  Implement planned meal schedule everyday this week.
10.  Go through all four bedrooms to rid of unwanted items (donate to Goodwill).

Sigh.  It seems lofty.  I sure hope having them in "writing" can help me get them done.  I'll keep you (Tiffany, Jessie Poo) updated!! :)

Simplicity here I come!

Ohmygoodness, I think I'm having a breakthrough.

I follow a blog called Money Saving Mom.  I actually follow several blogs, but more and more I seem to connect with so much of what she says and does.  She's very much an inspiration for me.

Lately, she's mentioned her minimalist wardrobe.  So I started clicking around her site to see what all she has posted on the subject and then read the comments to see other people's ideas.  I want a minimalist wardrobe.  I want a few great pieces instead of a whole closet full of crap I don't wear.

It doesn't surprise me that I feel this way.  I'm also the kinda gal who likes a few close friends instead of 20 people you can't have a real conversation with.

Anyway, it's like I'm overwhelmed by the greatness and the simplicity of the idea.  Quit buying crap that is cheap the ends up in drawers or in the closet and I never wear it.  Or the color isn't great or the fit isn't flattering.  Why do I buy that?  Because it's on sale?  Yep.  That's why.

So anyway, someone mentions Project 333.

Me=hook, line, and sinker.  I take the bait.  I'm totally sold on a minimalist wardrobe.

It's juicy, yet a solid!

I'm such a contradiction.  :)  I'm like those Starburst commercials.

On one hand, I hate having decisions made for me.  On the other hand, I hate having to make difficult decisions. It's overwhelming, this situation that I'm in.  I'm trying so hard to do the right thing, make the right choice and it's hard for me to do because I don't know which way is right.  I do feel like I've recently been swayed one way, but I know as soon as I see my homies, I'll be swayed another.  :)

Sigh.  Being a grown up isn't always that much fun.  :)

Mom, you shoulda stopped at two.

So I feel like we were super busy today, but didn't get a lot done.  We did get to cut outta the house for awhile and see my girlies.  Robyn is supposed to be going in to the the hospital tomorrow night to have her baby and we wanted to get together one last time.  My Smithsburg lovelies weren't able to make it down, but I'll see both of them this week anyway.  We had our super fave, frozen yogurt.  It's become quite an obsession around here. Adisson worked on selling some popcorn (for Cub Scouts), so that was good!  (ps, how is my "baby" almost nine years old?! Good grief!  Next year, he'll be TEN!!!)

School was light today.  I've decided not to talk about too much school stuff here, because I've started blogging elsewhere regarding our school activities.  It's redundant to type all the same stuff out twice.

In other news, apparently I'm Adisson's den leader for scouts.  I'm not super thrilled with the idea and neither is he.  He desperately wanted his dad to do it (so did I!) but Adam travels SO MUCH for work and the future isn't looking so bright for him (or us) to be around here anymore so he can't commit to doing it.  But the den needed a leader and no one else could do it, so of course I'd say yes.  I'm nervous because I don't know what I'm doing, but when it comes to those kids of mine, I'd do just about anything!

Speaking of, there's a Pack camping trip in a few weeks but we can't go because Adam will be running the Army Ten Miler down in DC that weekend.  So, in order to cross that off of our list of Scout things to do (and work on Adisson earning his Bear badge) we're going camping this weekend.  I've invited my friends and I think most of them are going to come out this weekend to hang out but I don't think anyone is going to spend the night....apparently it's supposed to be down in the 40's overnight and they are all too wimpy!  We're checking out Cunningham Falls, so hopefully my friends to the north will be able to stop by even for a little while.

Ok, I've got tons to do and I'd LOVE to get to sleep before three am (because that has apparently become my new bedtime while Adam has been gone), so it's off to clean up a little and work on school stuff for a little while.

Awkward. :)

Remember when you were a teenager and you'd go to a party or out with friends and you'd see your ex there and it would be all awkward and weird?  What's weirder is having that feeling when you're 29 and run into someone you used to be friends with at a cookout.  :)

I hate awkward situations.  I hate avoiding eye contact because it would be weird or hanging out in the same spot all night to avoid run-in's in the hallway.  :)  Just weird altogether.  I also hate when friendships run their course.  It makes for difficult social situations and I feel like I'm too old to feel this way. :)  

Typically, when I'm hanging out with my girls, time goes by so quickly and I can't believe that hours and hours have passed.  Tonight, I felt like time couldn't be moving slower.  I already didn't want to go to the place when I found out old friends would be there and then I just felt out of place when I got there, which totally sucks because I was around my closest friends in Maryland.

Ugh. 

In other news, my dearest friend Robyn should be having her sweet baby girl at any time and I can't wait to see her precious face!  I know for Robyn that the last nine months have flown by, but I feel like I just heard the news that she was pregnant, or that she was having a girl!  And here it is, time for her to be born!  I can't wait!  I made her a baby blanket but then decided that I hated it so I tore the whole thing apart and started over.  Now I'm in a race to get it done before they come home from the hospital (I don't need to have it ready before she's born, per se, just before she comes home, but I'd still like to get it done sooner rather than later).  

I wish my husband were home.  Sadly, I know the feeling of missing him will be something I deal with on a very long day to day basis thanks to a new, crappy assignment.  :(  Sometimes, being an Army wife is way less glamorous than they show on tv.  

So busy! I've been busy trying to get everything ready for all the company we're expecting and get school stuff ordered. I'm still not ready for company and definitely not ready for school. I don't know why I'm waiting so long to order the things we need...I'm running the risk of not getting our things in time for school to start and that's frustrating...because it's my fault. :(

On Friday, Adam will be taking Adisson to the Grand Prix races (it's actually just practice laps on Friday) in Baltimore and then his parents will be arriving sometime in the evening. We'll all head to the local Harley dealers last Bike Night of the year and then we're hoping to take them to our fave place for treats, Yogi Castle. :)

On Saturday, the plan is to head to Home Depot so the boys can build their kids projects, grab brunch at Denny's, and then head to DC for a walking tour of the monuments. Back home for some grub and then downtown for First Saturday.

Sunday, we'll have breakfast at home before heading to the Renaissance Festival (yay!) then home again for dinner and Big Brother.

Monday, some Waffle House before they head home and we head to Baltimore. In Baltimore, we're taking the boys to Urban Pirates (it's a secret and I'm SO excited!!) and then to Port Discovery.

Tuesday I have treatment.

And Wednesday, MY MOM COMES TO VISIT!!!! :) She's not been here in over a year and I can't wait to see her!!

While she's here, we plan on doing some outdoor stuff (giant bubbles, fishing), Maryland Science Center, downtown street festival, IKEA, and whatever else we can get into! Adam leaves while Mom is here and then as soon as she leaves, we start school.

Busy, busy, busy!

Last week we were invited by friends to go to the local minor league baseball game and sit in BOX SEATS! :) We had all gone to a game together earlier this summer and when we were there, our friend Kevin entered a drawing to win a box for a weeknight game. And he won!! :) And because they are such nice people, they invited us to attend the box game with them. And oh did we love it! Adisson was a little disappointed because his two goals (among many, many others) this summer were to 1. be shown on the scoreboard and 2. catch a foul ball. And I was *certain* he'd catch a foul ball when we were in the box seats. But the whole game...only one foul ball was hit to us and way too fast to catch! And no scoreboard for Adisson either. But we had such a great time in the nice seats!! :)

We've been working hard to declutter and organize the house. I'm trying so hard because I know how important it is to Adam. And to me. I just don't have the motivation for execution. But I'm trying. My in-laws are headed over to see us in a few weeks and I can't wait! The boys will be so excited! School starts in a few weeks and I'm kinda excited about that. I'd be more excited if I had finished planning and purchasing, but that is my goal for tomorrow.

So I'm tiiiiired as I just finished working out so I suppose going to bed would be the best idea. :)

So we tried camping. With 13 other people (15 if you count my sweet little nieces on the way!). We drove to Cooper's Rock, West Virginia to meet up with my Dad, his wife Heather, and my little brothers, Zach, Jeffrey, Randy, and Blake, my brother Jordan, his girlfriend Jana (who we were meeting for the first time), and his sons Boden and Cooper, and my brother Lucas, his lovely, sweet, and pregnant (WITH TWIN GIRLS!) girl Sarah and their son, Landen.

It seemed to be an almost central meeting place for all of us coming from three separate cities (two different states, none of which are WV). It was so amazingly beautiful there. It's a small campground having only 25 sites, but they are large, nice sites with electricity (not a must have, but it was nice). And it's just so beautiful there. In all likelihood, we'll never camp there again, due to its location, but we all just loved it.

We got there around 1:30 on Friday afternoon and set to work on getting our tent up. We were made fun of a little (good-naturedly, of course!) for bringing air mattresses and sheet and blanket sets, but roughing it in a tent is one thing...sleeping on the ground is another and not for me. :) We just barely got all of our stuff set up before Luke showed up and Jordan was shortly thereafter. My "middle" brothers were super nice and helpful and helped all of us get our stuff set up (my dad and his family had arrived at the campsite two days prior). It wasn't long before we were all together and having fun!

We quickly decided to head to Cooper's Rock since the weather for the weekend was uncertain and we didn't want to miss the chance to see the impressive sights in good weather. Oh.my.gosh. Sometimes, we all take for granted the marvelous beauty God has created until we take a second to look at something so amazing and impressive, you know there's only one possible explanation...God's hand at work. :)

We had a great time hiking the trail and then playing on the playground afterwards. It was fun trying to keep up with 10 kids (well, 9...Jax was sleeping in his carrier)...I felt like I was constantly counting them! We headed back to the campsite for dinner. Dad was our chef for the weekend, which was nice. :) Maybe next time, he can make his world famous sloppy joes. He did, however, make the best baked beans I've ever had! :)

Friday night went ok. Jax wasn't thrilled with camping. He wasn't the only one, either. My nephew Cooper wasn't too keen on tent sleeping, or anything camping related at all. :) But they are the youngest kids, just 2 and 1 (and just barely a year apart as their birthdays are just 10 days from each other) so I'm not surprised that they weren't overly thrilled with all things camping. Jax whined, fussed, and cried for awhile until I could get him to sleep. Then he was up throughout the night, but we made it through.

Saturday was overcast and a little sticky out but we were still so happy to just be spending time together. Each of us getting to spend time with our own families and together as a big family. We decided to head to a canoe rental place and head out on the water. All 18 of us AND Heather's dog!! :) 4 single kayaks, 2 double kayaks, and 2 canoes later...we were setting sail! Several of us (uh, no, absolutely not me!) jumped from the rope swings we found and Riley (the dog) decided to give swimming a try! Even Adisson jumped from the rope (which he LOVED and scared me!). Dad jumped from the rope and as he landed in the water, started groaning about his hand. We all made fun of him and brushed it off...until Sunday...more on that in a minute.

Afterwards, we headed back to the tents for Dad to make us some grub. Adam had also wanted to try some camping recipes he had seen so he did that as well. Oh, we also had an auction with some play money the kids had been earning that weekend and it was LOTS of fun! The little kids didn't know exactly what was going on, but we all had fun bidding away! After another evening of sitting around a campfire and enjoying time with brothers, cousins, uncles, and what not, it was time for bed.

And then it stormed. A LOT. And intensely. And long lasting. Dad, Heather, and their kids had to flee their tents (as they camp a lot and the tents were a little less sturdy than us newbies were dealing with...and because they hadn't expected to be camping this summer since Dad shoulda already deployed...). Luke brought a tarp after I mentioned it might rain so he covered their tent for extra protection...which seemed to do the trick. Jordan and his family got a little wet in our old tent, but it wasn't toooo bad. We had some leakage, but nothing much (uh, we bought some seam sealer after we got back...a few days later than we should have!). I was so worried all night that my boys would wake up in terror, but by the grace of God, they slept through the whole thing. :)

Then on Sunday morning, Jordan and Adam were called in for surgery. :) Ok, not really, but they had to cut Dad's wedding ring off because he had injured his fingers the day before on the rope swing and his fingers were VERY swollen. After a few minutes, they managed to get it cut off. It was pretty intense to watch...I felt so bad for Dad! We also had to work on tearing down our campsites...with everything soaking wet.

We drove into Morgantown to have lunch at Cici's with everyone before going our separate ways. Then, drove home, in the pouring down rain and horrible thunderstorms. With our luggage on top of the van in a soft sided cargo carrier. So if it wasn't wet from thunderstorms the night before, it was soaking wet by the time we got home. :)

But it was such a fun weekend. I got to see all of my brothers. I got to play with my adorable sweet nephews. And the five of us had a great time camping. We're ready to go again! :)

Oh, I've been so stressed out trying to get things figured out for our school year. Like, how do I not have things ready? We start school in a month?!?!?

I've gone back and forth a hundred times it seems...trying to figure out what to do.

I think I've got a good idea now. Mostly.

I've got to work on what Zander is going to be doing for preschool. I mean, he'll mostly follow along with Adisson's unit studies, but on a very basic level. But he needs to start working on his handwriting and letter comprehension. He learns a little differently than Adisson did when he was four, so I've got to change things up a bit. So glad I'm afforded the opportunity to do so. :)

And I'm trying to get things ready for this weekend. It's a little difficult to remain excited as two of my brothers, you know, the grown ones, can't seem to get along this week. Makes me wanna not go. But I want to see my nephews so bad that I can deal with pretty much anything. I miss them terribly. There's a few more things we need to get before our trip but we should be able to pick those things up this week (read: on Thursday night after Adam gets home and I don't have to take the boys to WalMart).

Ugh...screaming toddler calls......to be continued

Just hanging out this evening enjoying time with my boys. We watched this evenings Family Movie Night movie mostly because Adisson is OBSESSED with being a spy and I knew this movie would be right up his alley. He loved it!

I spent some time doing my nails as I never seem to have uninterrupted time to complete them. And I really didn't have that time tonight either as Jaxon was intent on touching every single nail I painted. But finally, all twenty nails painted. Which will last about fourteen seconds before it all starts chipping away. :)

We have our big family camping trip coming up this weekend. It will be my Dad and his wife and kids, Lucas, his girlfriend (who is five months pregnant with TWIN GIRLS!!), and their son, and Jordan and his sons. We're meeting up in West Virginia to camp at a place called Cooper's Rock. It looks AMAZING and it's also super cool because my nephew's named Cooper. :)

The boss is outta town this week so I'm hoping we can try some new crafts everyday while we're getting for our camping trip. There's definitely a few things on our Summer Fun List that I'd like to cross off.

That's about all that's going on for us. Suppose I'll get off of the computer as I'd still really like to get my hair dyed this evening. When I dye it black, my scalp ends up purple and I'd like for that to fade over the next few days before I have to be seen in public again. :)

So tonight when I was browsing pinterest, after facebook it's my most favorite place on the net, I found a quote that I really loved that said,

"Sometimes God calms the storm, sometimes He lets the storm rage and calms His child."

Dear Lord, can you help me find the calm?

Nevermind, not heading to Washington state right now. :)

Adam's orders were deleted and we *should* be here until February. *fingers crossed*

But the Army is a fickle, fickle man so who knows what the future really holds.

Have tons more to say but laptop battery is dying. Back tomorrow.... :)

We're moving.

To Fort Lewis, Washington. Nearly 2800 miles away.

To say that I'm sad would be the understatement of the century. :(

My plan for the day.

So I finally got to go downtown and do some shopping. In cute little (way overpriced) stores with no kids whining or me begging them to keep their hands in their pockets. Marissa and I had a LOVELY time!!

I also saw so many things I loved. Lots of them, I could make myself. So that's what I'm working on now. The things I loved the most were plastic bag bags (tote/handbags made out of plastic grocery bags), crocheted necklaces (still working on that DIY plan), chocolate mustaches, and LOTS of ideas for Robyn's baby shower. I will say that Robyn's shower is shaping up to be the nicest, cutest one I've ever thrown. I think it will be that way mostly because there are so many of us that are going to work on it.

Today when I take a break from coupon clipping, I think I'm making the boys some chocolate mustaches. I saw them at a gorgeous, yummy chocolate shop downtown but at $5 for a pair, I thought for sure I could make some for my guys. So that's task #1.

I've also promised the boys that we would make sidewalk chalk. It's on our summer fun list, and we've been meaning to do it for a week, but we've been super busy. So today is the day.

But I also have lots of coupons to go through, figure out something for dinner when we don't have much (I haven't been to the store in two weeks!), cleaning to do, and Adi has VBS. Fortunately, Adam should be home at some point this morning to help out with stuff.

If I manage to get things done like I'm hoping, pictures will be posted!! :)

My hands, they were strong.

It's a little after one so it's just about my bedtime. Guess I'll say my peace for the day.

And I have none. :)

Good things happening around my house:

1. I bought two Trofast toy storage systems yesterday. They originated at ikea and some lovely couple bought them, took them home, assembled them with 5,723 screw thingees and an allen wrench the size of pencil lead. Sometime after that and before yesterday they decided they didn't want them anymore. Enter craigslist. And me, the craigslist junkie (though my stalking is for furniture and not pets....like it is for *some people*). I saw them, sensed a steal, and pounced.

I went to pick them up in an area I didn't know existed in Maryland. Spent about forty seven hours trying to load them into the van (yay the sto-n-go saved me, boo the sto-n-go hates me...nearly thought I'd have to leave a kid behind). Got them home and into the house. Those suckers are heavy. And the moving muscles were left to me, Ms. Zero Upper Body Strength, and Adisson, a 40 pound 8 year old. Thought for sure the things were going to be sitting in the driveway when Adam got home. But alas we got them in. And started the long, gross process of cleaning them. I won't badmouth the people who assembled this furniture because assembling crap from ikea is more frustrating than trying to catch floating poop in a bathwater (uhhh, that also happened to me yesterday), but I'll nicely say that these items were *ahem* less than clean.

Got them cleaned and disinfected. Today, we drug them into the school room and started dumping crap into the tubs. I told the boys that if we got the school room reorganized, I'd let them get their old Little People out from under the stairs (like, 25 year old Little People toys, not elderly residents of our creepy storage area). We cleaned a little but it's not done and I realized I have no desire to dig those storage tubs out of the closet, so I'm making them wait for Adam to get them...and they aren't happy.

2. I'm growing peas! So I started my earthbox this year and I'm growing peas and baby carrots (or like midget carrots or something). It's been going along well and in the past few days I've noticed pea pods on the vines! I can now grow humans and peas!! They aren't ready yet and the carrots won't be ready for another month or so, but it's working!

We started our pumpkins last weekend. We're already a month behind on getting them into the ground, so I'm not sure how well this is going to work out for us this year, but I'll try anything. I told the boys we could grow the Great Pumpkin so darn it if I'm not going to give it a shot.

That's about all. Got lots of cleaning to do tomorrow before my husband returns home. Not sure what he's going to say about having to eat my cooking now instead of having a real chef cook for him for the last few weeks (ohhh, Army life is clearly hard work), but I'm also not sure it matters. :) I'm sure he'll be gone on another mission soon.

In the meantime, it's nearly 2:00 and that's my bedtime. Unfortunately, that's about four hours after Adam's bedtime so I'm going to have a fun time changing that now that he's coming home. Old men sure do like to get to bed early.

A classified ad for my reading audience of 2.

In a perfect world, Maryland and Ohio would be neighbors. Like I could go over to Tiffany's a few times a week and see her and the kids. And my niece (soon to be nieces, plural!!) and nephews could come over to Aunt 'Cole's for fun, for crafts, for cake, for sleepovers. Because I'm a pretty rad aunt. And my littles will never know. :(

Because sometimes it sucks being without a best friend that you can hang out with. I do have friends here. Amazing friends. Friends I'm more than blessed by. I could call any one of them in a pinch and I know I'd have people to count on. But I want a best friend.

I'm from the school of more than one person can be your bestie. Like, T-Yo is my bestie. She's my homegirl, my sister, my truly, my once in a lifetime partner in crime (and by crime, I mean life...the life of mothering and being a wifey). But she lives a few hundred miles away and we consider it a good year if we get to see each other twice. I feel like I should pay a daily homage to Alexander Graham Bell as without his telephone invention, I'd be a saddddd girly.

So my friends here, they kind of already have their favorites. I'm included. I'm invited. We hang out. We talk on the phone. We go on outings together. We plan family weekends together, but I'm not the first one they call if they need something, or if they have exciting news. I hear about it, I'm kept in The Know. But still.

So the spot is open. Maryland Best Friend needed. Must love kids, shopping, kid entertainment (museums, zoos, etc.), playdates, girls day out, bargains, and hanging out. An interest in crafts and coupons are a plus. :)

I know, Mom, you already told me you love me today!

Tons to say, but holding a baby who won't go to sleep. :)

I have the best kids. So not really, sometimes they whine, sometimes they fight (ok, lots of times) and sometimes I get very aggravated with them. But man are they good kids. :)

They are nice, considerate, polite, respectful, endearing, thoughtful, and loving.

Smart, generous, brave, timid, apprehensive, daring, creative, sweet.

I couldn't be more fortunate, more blessed, more in love.

I keep getting told that God gives me the kids He wants for me to have. I've been struggling a lot lately with why God didn't feel like I should have a daughter. But I couldn't be happier with my boys. They are the greatest gifts in my life.

Even when they torment each other, even when they do things they KNOW they shouldn't, they are so amazing and so wonderful.

I tell them that. I tell them how great I think they are everyday.

Everyday? Are you sure, Nicole?

Yes. Everyday, those boys know how much they mean to me. How much I love them. How great I think they are.

Adisson gets embarrassed, Zander gets excited, Jax is just confused, but they all know that their Mom thinks they are great.

So I may not be great at a lot of things, but I know I'm great at that. :)

.......instead.......

I am a huge Nicholas Sparks fan. Read everything he writes. At least twice. So I definitely had to have "Dear John" when it was released. Since it's about a relationship with a man in the Army, it definitely hit close to home. I cried a lot when I read it. Both times. So when the movie came out, I decided there was no way. Not going to watch it. I live the life (not that one specifically, per se) so why cry my eyes out while it's on the tv in front of me?

But I watched it. I started it last night and when it got to the part where I wanted to throw the remote, I turned it off. Then declared that I was going to delete it from my DVR list. I didn't. I finished it tonight. Cried a lot. A whole lot.

Because I know that feeling. I know the feeling of being second fiddle to the Army. Adam and I knew each other way before he met the United States Army. Had a baby before his flirtation with the Army began. But when the war started, the love of my life, found a new love. And since May 21, 2003 when he swore his allegiance to this country, my life has never been the same.

Sometimes the honor of being an Army wife is overwhelming and I realize that our sacrifice, the sacrifices of my children, are all worth it.

But sometimes, I'm selfish. I doubt that will ever go away (hello, it's the Nicole Show, thought you knew!). Sometimes, I want to be more important than the Army. More important that a unit, a company, a battery, a brigade. More important than the next mission, the next career move, the next school, the next training. Sometimes, I want to be reminded that his loyalty is to me, to us, not to the service.

So watching a movie where someone decides that his loyalty to the Army is more important than the love of his life, is heartbreaking. Maybe I shouldn't feel this way. Maybe I should be proud (I always am), maybe I should be less selfish, less needy (trust me, I've come a long way). Maybe I'm the only Army wife that feels like I'm just along for the ride. Somehow I doubt that.

Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead.

Smiling now...

Nevermind, I'll find someone like you.

I wish nothing but the best for you, too

Don't forget me, I beg

I remember you said,

"Sometimes it lasts in love,

But sometimes it hurts instead."

Man, I could listen to Adele all day. Most amazing voice. Must buy album. :)

In other news, sometimes I just need to think. I guess that time would be now. It's late. The boys have been asleep for awhile, so they'll be up in just mere hours. But sometimes, I just need to remind myself that I'm not only, Nicole, SSG McGhee's wife, Nicole, Adisson, Zander, and Jaxon's Mom, but way before those things, I was just Nicole. Sometimes, I feel like I get lost and lose sight of who I am when not defined by the boys in my life. I love being a mother, and I suppose I'll say that being a wife is lovely as well (though, not nearly as easy as being a mother), but who am I outside of those definitions? And why, as I'm so close to thirty I feel like it's about to smother me with its finality of age, don't I know who I am? How am I not comfortable with myself, in my own skin, as my own person? When do I find that?

Anyway, off to finish sorting q's for the girls.

"Trying to make it work, but man these times are hard."

Toot bags are funny!

I always feel like I want to talk about specific things but then I never do.

Like how I saved a ton of money at CVS this week. ($3.47 for $34.45 worth of stuff, with $9.99 in ecb's leftover)

Or how I saved a little bit of money at Giant Eagle this week. (saved $80 on my groceries, spending $110....little more than I like to spend, a little less than I like to save, but it is what it is.)

Or how I've decided on a school plan for next year (uhhh, finally!) and I'm pretty excited to school both my boys at the same time and I know I'll quickly regret that as soon as school starts.

Or the cool things I've planned on our Summer Fun List.

Or the amazing things we did this week (lake with friends (Christine, Marissa, and Robyn) on Monday, playdate at Lynda's on Tuesday, grocery shopping with all the boys on Wednesday, dinner and cake pops with Marissa on Friday, Home Depot Kids Workshop and lunch with Kelly and kids this afternoon).

Or my pretty exciting project plans (console tv rehab, bench rehab, and table makeover).

Or my plans for the kids bedrooms.

Or my amazingly awesome trip we're planning (errr, I'm planning) to visit Gettysburg, Sesame Place, the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island.

But instead I ramble on and on about nothing or everything. But that's how I am. I'm a variety bag of candy. Some pieces are yummy (sometimes I'm fun to be around), some pieces are sticky (sometimes I'm indecisive), some pieces are gross (sometimes, I'm just a witch), but I am who I am. I hope that the bad stuff continues to be less as I feel it does as I get older and the good stuff continues to be greater because all in all, I'm a pretty rad person. Maybe it's weird to toot my own horn (I hate saying toot because I have boys that say it all the time, but it's also funny after hearing Ava call a whoopie cushion a "toot bag"), but really, I kinda have to be pretty awesome...because have you met my kids....pretty amazing and I also have some of the best friends ever in all of the world....so that must mean I'm pretty best as well. :)

Today, however, has been chaotic as the boys are DEFINITELY missing their daddy and when that happens, EVERYONE gets fussy.

Furniture rehab!!

Soooo, I've decided to start my first piece of furniture rehab. I saw on a few blogs where people took a console TV and turned it into something else after taking the tv guts out. And I decided I would be one of those people. AND, as fate would have it, about 24 minutes after I decide that I NEED a console TV, someone on craigslist lists one for free and it's only 15 minutes away. Adam can't go get it himself because console tv's apparently weigh 273 pounds. So we load up all the kids at nine o'clock at night to go get a tv. It's kinda out in

the middle of nowhere so I'm hopeful it will still be curbside once we get there. Otherwise, all four of my boys are gonna be unhappy....yikes.

It is still there. :)

We load it and come home. Then my sweet, wonderful husband takes all the crap out of it. LOTS of screws, TONS of wires and the tv pieces are removed and I'm left with a shell. Unfortunately, Adam is leaving tomorrow for 2 1/2 weeks in Oklahoma so whatever I don't get done today with his help with have to be done by me (riiiiight) or wait until he gets home (way more likely).

But I'm thrilled. What am I turning it into you ask? I'm making it a shoe cubby. "Brief" backstory: We live in a split foyer. You come to the front door and inside you have to go upstairs or downstairs, there's nothing at the door. We don't wear shoes in the house so when we come in the front door, all the shoes get left at the door. There are ten feet in this house and about 13 pairs of shoes constantly sitting at the front door waiting for feet. It's a mess. So I decide we are going to start coming in the garage door and go through the game room to get to the stairs. That means a huge pile of shoes in ADAM'S ROOM! Perish the thought. So he's scooped them all up and tossed them in my craft closet (sleep with one eye open, destroyer of creativity and peace). So we need a shoe cubby. Hence the console tv. Sure, I could work a shoe cubby out of a $40 piece of furniture at Target, but I wanna make something (other than crocheted baby booties). Here's hoping I can get this done before the end of the summer.....

Another busy weekend....

What a great weekend! On Friday we met up with some of my favorite people at a lake I'd never been to. It had a nice man made beach that we sat on to watch the kids in the water. My big boys had the best time! After Jax got over his issue with sand, he had a great time, too. There are pics, so I'll try to upload them soon. :)

Friday night, I got to have a date with my friend Robyn! :) We fed her current food addiction (frozen yogurt) and sat outside on a bench and talked for a few hours. It was so nice as I never get to spend enough time with Robyn, one of the coolest people ever.

Saturday, we went to Home Depot for the boys to build at the Kids Workshop. They made super cute electronic valets. I'm hoping we can get them painted this week. Adi wants to keep his to charge his stuff, but Zander is giving his to me. :) Then he went to Adisson's soccer game. His team lost, again, but he did soooo well. I was so proud of how hard he played!

We went to WalMart right after the game to pick up stuff for a cookout we were having. Adam asked his friends that helped us move into the house to come over for dinner. They did, bringing with them their family or girlfriend and we had such a great time. I invited Marissa and Lukas over to hang out since they are down one family member for the next few weeks (while Marissa's husband is off doing Army stuff). Of course, Adam put his friends to work by having them help him build a kid wash for the boys. They can't wait to play with it today, despite the cloudy, overcast sky. :)

Today, Adam has his first paid gig as a photographer. :) I hope it goes well despite the aforementioned crappy lack of sunlight. I'm sure it will, I'm just nervous for him. We also have a soccer game to watch this afternoon. They only have two games left, but Adam will miss next Saturday's game because he'll be away for work, so we're definitely excited to see today's game. I need to run to the store afterwards because I have blood treatment tomorrow so I won't be able to get much done and Adam leaves on Tuesday.

Just another busy day. :) But I sure love it this way!

Today

Sigh.

Last June I started using Livestrong to document my fitness goals. I signed in today for the first time since sometime last June. I've gained weight since then, not that I'm surprised. I seemed to lose my baby weight from Jax last summer, but I do know some of that is attributed to my getting very sick in August and being hospitalized.

After I got out of the hospital and was diagnosed with CVID, I started my blood infusions. And since then, I've gained 15 pounds. That's not a lot to some people, but I typically weigh less than 100 pounds. It's a lot to me and it's noticeable. Some days it's the only thing I think about. On those days, I realize how grateful I am that I don't have a daughter to pass on my horrible issues with body image. :(

I want to be in better shape. I have to be in better shape. I don't want to live my life being miserable because of issues that I can control but choose not to.

So Jillian Michaels kicks the tar outta me each night when I do her Ripped in 30 dvd. It sucks, it's hard, it makes me sweaty and sticky. But it works. And I pray and pray and pray that I can stick to it.

I just have to.

Me? Long-winded? Or is it long-typed?

Holy moses, I'm tired. :)

On Friday night, my in-laws came down to MD for the weekend. :) My father-in-law road his new motorcycle down to surprise Adam (he knew he was riding, but not that he bought a new Harley) so they were in father/son Harley heaven together. :)

Saturday we got up SUPER early! Had Fractured Prune donuts for breakfast (yum!!) and then headed down to DC. First stop was to check on tickets to Ford's Theater. Snatched up some free tix for an 11:00 tour. Headed over to Madame Tussaud's Wax Museum and had fun there snapping pics with famous fake people! Back to Ford's for our tour. Adisson was THRILLLLLED!! Adam even snapped his picture just feet away from where Lincoln was shot. I'll add that as soon as Adam gets the pics off of the card. Lunch at the Hard Rock Cafe where Pam and I shared an AMAZING burger that had caramelized onions and apples and lots of yummy goodness! Then we walked down to the American History museum. It wasn't too far of a walk (only 0.7 miles) but we had already spent hours walking. By the time we got there we were pretty tired. But we checked out the cool stuff. :) Then we drove by the Washington Monument on our way to Arlington Cemetery where we watched the changing of the guard at the Tomb of the Unknowns. Pretty intense and amazing to see. Stopped at McDonald's on the way home for the boys' first Happy Meal in over a month! :)

Sunday, the big boys took their Harley's down to DC as part of Rolling Thunder and the Ride to the Wall. They had a great time being together, bikes and patriotism are the two things Bob and Adam have most in common. :) Pam and I took the boys to Cici's Pizza for lunch, went to see Kung Fu Panda 2 afterwards, then went to the mall to see the doggies and have ice cream. :) Memaw bought the boys a book each (Adisson's obsessed with Diary of a Wimpy Kid, Zander LOVES Toy Story books, and Jax got a book about the song Baby Beluga because we sing it together ---- minus him singing it). Met up with the hot, dirty, sunburned dudes at the house and had Famous Dave's for dinner. Yummolicious!

Monday they came over super early and I made breakfast before they hit the road. Then I wanted to sleep all day but we had things to do and I had errands to run before Adam left for Connecticut today. Got a few errands run, my fave shopping trip was to JoAnn's, of course.

This morning we got up at 5:00 so we could take Adam to the Amtrak station to leave for his two day trip to New Haven. Haven't heard from him, assuming he made it there ok. :)

Last night, I bought Jillian Michael's new workout DVD, Ripped in 30. O.M.G. I have a love/hate relationship with Jillian. I love that she works me so hard and I hate that she works me so hard. I swear and yell at her by the last half of the workout. I hope, hope, hope I can stick with this workout like I intend to. I'm sure I won't because I don't stick with anything. But I can't stand how much weight I've put on in the last 8 months due to my blood infusions. It's great to be healthy, it sucks to look exactly like your friend who is six months pregnant. I've only ever weighed what I do now when I'm halfway through a pregnancy. This isn't how I want to look and the only person that can change that is myself. I just lack the follow through. Here's to hoping I can fix that.

Ok, I've got to get upstairs. Working on my sewing machine tonight and I'm determined to fix it. We'll see if I don't break it more. :(

Sooooo tired. :( I hate days of utter and complete exhaustion.

We had a spectacular weekend. On Friday night, my friend Christine and her family came over. We hung out, had dinner, then C and I took off to go see a movie while the Daddies stayed home with the kids. Unfortunately, we didn't make it to the movie in time so we went to the mall and did a little shopping. I snagged some super cute goodies for my friend Robyn (expecting a girl later this year!!) and some stuff for the boys. We got home to find everything just fine with all the kids and our husbands playing xbox. :)

Saturday we had Adisson's soccer game. They lost, again. And horribly. But Adisson did a really good job and I'm super proud of how well he played! We then ran to Lowe's to pick up flowers for the flower bed out front. So TONS of flowers, several bags of mulch, and a HUGE bag of potting mix...we were on our way home. We spent allllll day working outside. I got my Earthbox planted with my peas and carrots. We got a flower pot planted with some seeds that Grandpa Gramps sent over. We planted tons of flowers and have tons of flowers left to plant. :)

Sunday, Adam started painting the game room/man cave/room where nothing belongs. He hates painting and was pretty fussy about having to do so. :) But it's our very last room to paint. We still have a few things we'd like to get painted (baseboards, garage, garage door, flower bed ties) but as far as rooms go, the game room is the last one to get done. I spent allllll day doing laundry. gross. But it's caught up.

Today was a wasted day. I seem to have at least one a week. I was too exhausted to get much done. I'm also tired of the boys whining and complaining about dinner (all of them) so it's getting more and more difficult to get excited to cook dinner for a bunch of people that just complain.

Anyway, we have school stuff to work on tomorrow. The boys have dentist appointments on Wednesday and then Christine invited us to come over to her house afterwards so that's our plan for the next few days.

Off to clean up before I go to bed.

Who let the CAT in? Who, who, who?

So today we've been testing. Adisson's taking his first California Achievement Test. It's not required until next year but I'm interested in seeing how well he does and since he's not used to testing (we don't do tests around here because I don't need him to prove mastery of a subject. We don't move on until there's mastery of a subject.) I wanted him to have a year of practice until it's required.

So far he's doing really well. I'll send the test off when he's done so it can be scored. Scored just means we'll find out how well he's done compared to other second graders that have taken the test, we don't actually get a "score" of how many he had correct. Fortunately, I am as smart as a second grader and I can grade the test myself to see how many he has correct.

And for the first time today, Zander and I did a Before Five in a Row book, Caps for Sale. That's almost embarrassing to admit because we should have been doing them for the past few years. But it went splendidly well and I'm hopeful that we can get through the whole Before book by the time school starts in the fall and Zander may be ready for some early Five in a Row books. That's weird to think about....Adi started doing Five in a Row when Zander was a tiny little baby!! :)

Jax has been more than a handful today, for the past two days actually. God bless his tiny little gums for being so sore and because he teethes more than all the children of the world combined. :) He's in a better mood now that Daddy is home, though.

Gotta get back to test proctoring. Only a few more questions to go. :)

So my cleaning schedule hasn't been going well. :( But I still feel as though I'm working hard to clean the house for the right reasons. I've had people over three different times in the past week (something I'd rarely do because of the constant chaos). I'm trying to change myself and I do feel a difference, I'm just not sure if Adam sees a difference.

Lately, I've also been dealing with incredible fatigue. I'm so blessed that my treatments have made me healthier than I've ever been in my life. I've had one sinus infection this year and trust me, by the middle of May in my PT (prior to treatment) days, I would have been sick repeatedly, several doctor visits, several rounds of antibiotics. So I'm very grateful that those days are behind me. I do continue to struggle with exhaustion. Some days I feel like I'm slogging through a giant mud puddle and my feet keep getting stuck. The energy is sucked away and I'm just trying to make it through the day. I hate that feeling. It's nearly crippling.

My eight year old has been testing me on what feels like a constant basis. Goodness, that child seems to try my patience at the drop of a hat. It worries me that this is just a glimpse into my future of life with a teenager. The middle one isn't driving me too crazy and then I have the littlest doing every. single. thing. he can to get into trouble. He's not allowed to touch the tv and I swear he turns that thing off 20+ times a day while the boys are trying to play a video game or we're watching tv. Turns it off, I turn it back on, turns it off, I turn it back on. Cycle repeats. :) Loooooove that fun toddler stage!

On a more serious note, I guess I'm realizing what it means when a friendship has run its course. I feel like I've lost a super close friend, someone I felt was very important to me, and that it's only affecting me. It hurts to be rejected and it makes me sad. I hate that I spend so much time trying to do something to fix it, and the effort isn't reciprocated. :( Turns out that relationships with girls are difficult long past high school.

Well, I have tonnnns to get done today so I've got to put down the computer. If only I could tear myself away from Pinterest. :)

I'm a National Consumer Panelist, for real! :)

Again, off track. :( Yesterday was a treatment day for me and that's an entire day that I don't get ANYTHING done. I spend the morning just trying to do something productive, the afternoon at the clinic, and the evening laying in bed wishing it was the next day.

On a good note, my lovely friend, Teal came over to visit yesterday morning to swap coupons with me. It's such a blessing to have such great friends. I met Teal about six months ago or so but it's been in the last few months that we've gotten to spend more time together and I just really think she's a great person and friend. I'm so fortunate to have the great friends I have here in Frederick. I have met several of my new friends through my friend Marissa. I'm so thankful for 'Rissa and her social butterfly-ness that has introduced me to some *wonderful* girls.

Today I managed to go to the library to return books and get some new ones. Adi went with and was allowed to pick out some new ones. He got two chapter books, another one I convinced him to get, and then FOUR books about Abe Lincoln. He's a teensy bit obsessed. :) We then stopped over a super cute clothing store downtown and there.....I applied for a job. Totally weird. I haven't worked in FOREVER, but I love the store and she mentioned on facebook that she was looking for someone to make jewelry. It's a long shot, but I gave it a shot. I'm pretty sure I'll be telling you a week from now that it didn't work out for me, but I didn't want to ignore the opportunity to see if this could actually happen.

Then ran to Giant Eagle. Not a huge savings day today, but I scored some super great bargains and saved 50% of my bill. I'm not sure how much higher, if any, food costs are here in Frederick, compared to the national average. But according to the chart I found (about 18 months outdated) we are between the "thrifty" and "low-cost" spending for our family of five each month in groceries. Just food alone, I know we're thrifty, but I included HBA goods, also. Happy to save us some money, that's for sure.

And tonight for the first time, I used my NCP scanner to scan my purchases. :) Adisson really wanted to scan more of the food, but I told him I needed to figure it out first. I'm sure I'll tire of it soon enough and he'll be the designated scanner. :)

Anyway, I guess that's enough of my weird rambling thoughts for now. I'm glad it's just a few people that I know and love that read this jumbled mess of nonsense. :)

Back on track, woot.

I did manage to get a few things done today, though Adam is frustrated that I didn't get enough done for him to continue spraying the bug killer around the house. I hate bugs. grossssss nasty bugs. And we have some issues. Ants, lots and lots of ants. Spiders. A few other various bugs. But it's the ants....and the spiders. And let me tell you, Zander has some VERY intense feelings about bugs. HE HATES BUGS! Screams, yells, runs, and sometimes cries. So I'm also disappointed that Adam wasn't able to continue spraying bug killer.

I did get caught back up on my 31 Days to Clean challenge. Woooot. :)

Depending on how early we get things done tomorrow, Adisson *might* take his practice test for his standardized testing that he'll do later this month. But I doubt that happens. We have lots to do tomorrow and I have treatment tomorrow afternoon. AND Adi has soccer practice tomorrow night. I'll likely keep the little guys home with me and Adam and Adisson will go to practice. I think I can handle the little boys for an hour or so while the big boys are off kicking the ball around. :) But I'd rather try to handle them here instead of running around the soccer field.

My friend, Teal, is coming over tomorrow morning to coupon swap with me. I've got lots for her to go through and she's got lots for me to go through. And then I'm going to take what we have leftover and send them overseas. I've never done that before and I don't know why. I'm a big supporter of military families!! :) Plus, I'm excited to see Teal and the boys will go nuts. :)

Ok, off to pick up kids that fell asleep hanging out with Dad and are scattered around the living room. :) There are lots of reasons I love homeschooling (literally, A LOT!!!) but I really love our flexibility. Stay up a little late, sleep in a little longer, read books in our pajamas. This truly is the good life. :)

Where's that money tree again?

I don't feel that we live that extravagantly. We did just move into a much larger house than we were living in (and it has cost us A LOT of money), but otherwise, nothing big and fancy going on here. I clip coupons to save money on food. We never have to fill our vehicles up with gas more than twice per month (sometimes less). I've cut eating dinner out of our current budget. I buy secondhand clothes and household items. We do have some extras (cable tv, high speed internet, netflix, cell phone data plans) but again, nothing outrageous. So why does it feel like making ends meet is as good as it's going to get? And if gas prices continue to rise, our trips to Ohio are going to be drastically reduced. I'd work if I thought that would help. Adam travels so much for work and sometimes on just a few days notice (and then he's gone for several weeks), so me working seems less likely to help, especially since a part time job wouldn't pay me enough to cover a sitter when Adam's not home.

It's just aggravating.

31 Days to What Now??

UGHHHH! I'm the worst ever at this challenge, btw. :) Thursday I felt like crap. I have days where the exhaustion is just overwhelming. Like I'm wearing 20 pound weights on each appendage. I try hard to remember that I am a sick person. That even though I feel ok, I deal with an incurable blood disease that has various effects on my body. Anyway....

Friday we did extra school work.

So Thursday and Friday didn't get done (re: the challenge). And I didn't get caught up over the weekend because yesterday I was SUPER busy (more on that in a minute) and today was Mother's Day. No work for me. :)

Tomorrow is a new day. A day when things will get done. I'm a work in progress. I feel I'm making some progress and trying harder. I hope my boys see that, too.

So yesterday. We did so much! Adi had a soccer game (at 8:30 AM! On Saturday! Good gravy!) that we were super late for thanks to traffic delays due to a half marathon being run through downtown. Then we stopped by Goodwill to see if my sewing machine cabinet was still there....it was....but it was sold. Darn. Then to Home Depot. The boys made cute little flower planters (for meee, for Mother's Day!). Took all the boys home. Met up with my friends at the fairgrounds (where I was late because traffic was being rerouted because of that dang marathon!) for a kids consignment sale. Super scored some major necessities. Got Adi six pairs of shorts and some play shoes. Zan got some great sandals (look almost new!) and Jax snagged a a pair of super cute, brand new Robeez (that's shoes if you aren't hip to the toddler slang).

Then we went to an antique barn sale. Super neat, super inspiring, super overpriced. There will come a day when I'll pay $80 for a chalkboard with a pretty wood frame around it. That day will come the same day I spread the news that we're expecting again. (psssst: neither of those days will ever come.) But I did leave there with an amazing dictionary from 1932 to use for a few projects and more ideas than my head can process.

Then I stopped by Goodwill again. It's half off weekend and I was so inspired from the tag sale I wanted to find things to redo. Picked up a few things, came home. Exhausted. :)

Today was lovely. Got my planters from my boys (they painted them yesterday while I was gone) and super cute handmade cards. Got a lovely gift from my husband. :) Cleaned and organized Adam's game room. Hopefully he'll be able to use it as his man cave soon. :) Ran a few errands with my oldest guy. We picked up some fried chicken from Giant Eagle (uhhhh, ok, so here's the deal. We didn't count that as having dinner out because we bought it from GE and because it's Mother's Day and I wasn't cooking. So we're still on track for not eating out for the month of May. :) Besides, my idea, my rules apply.) and some CAKE!! So we had a great evening.

Now it's late and this post is so long you've likely fallen asleep (wake up, Jessie Poo!!). But that's what my weekend held. Being super busy. So tomorrow I'll be super busy at home catching up on my schedule and cleaning bedrooms. :)

Happy Mother's Day!

Lots to do today, super busy day tomorrow.

Yesterday wasn't as productive as I had hoped. I'm definitely hoping today yields way more results. We have a pretty busy weekend in store and I'd rather start off with a clean(-ish) house. Tonight we are going to bike night at the Harley dealer and apparently Adam signed us up for some dealership tour. Not exactly sure what it is or why we're doing it, but whatever.

Tomorrow will be a hectic mess of a day. Adisson has to be at soccer game BY 8:15...yep that's AM. Afterwards we're stopping by Goodwill. This weekend is half off the whole store and there's a sewing machine and cabinet that I *REALLY* want to have. It didn't have a price tag on it when I saw it last weekend so I'm not sure how much it is originally, but half off sounds even better. :) I went to Goodwill last Sunday so it's going to be a miracle if it's still there tomorrow. But I'm hoping. I'm not sure I'll be able to pick it up, I might have to pay for it and wait until later when Adam can get it. He can't go to Goodwill with us after the game because he has to get to Jui Jitsu class right after the game. Then after Goodwill, I'm taking the boys to Home Depot to build. It's a really cute tulip planter tomorrow.

After we're done at Home Depot, Adam should be about done at class. We'll all get back to the house. I'm going to lunch and shopping with my friends. We're hitting up this awesome looking tag sale to see what it's like. After we finish up shopping, I think my family and I are going to head downtown to walk around for First Saturday. All in all, a ton going on and I can't wait!! :)

Ok, so I need to be cleaning. Lots to do today. :) Oh and a super big "HI!!" to one of my most favorite people, Jessssie Poo, for stopping by my blog to read about my mundane life. :) Jess is super awesome and I totally wish we could hang out way more often. Love ya and your wonderful kids!! :)

I lied. I'm a big fat liar. I didn't clean my fridge yesterday because I'm lazy. It needed done, I didn't do it and then said it didn't need cleaned. Truthfully, it wasn't bad and didn't take me long. Nothing sticky or slimy so just a quick wipedown was necessary. But today I did it. Along with my Day Three challenge.

Today I also asked my family members what I could do to show them I love them by caring for our home. My husband told me that he'd like for "technology" to be a reward and not a priority. He says I spend too much time on the computer (guilty as charged), watching tv (I could watch less), and talking on the phone (uhhhh, not sure how I'll give that up). He would like for me to focus more on the necessary tasks and use Facebook (my guiltiest pleasure) as my reward for being diligent. Zander told me that I could show him I love him with just one word...."Clean." Sobering message from my preschooler. Adisson would like for me to set up a responsibilities and rewards chart for him. He'd really like to be earning money by helping out around the house. He proved that by doing several extra chores tonight without being asked. When I asked Jax what I could do he said "Dad".....I'll leave that alone. :)

I know my family wants me to be a better housekeeper and it's not that I *don't* want to be, I just lack the motivation to be one. I didn't have a housekeeping role model. I didn't learn how to do that. So now I'm trying to learn. But you know what they say about teaching an old dog new tricks. But Sarah Mae says if you're breathing there's still time to change.

And I sure am trying.

It's Ikea time baby!!

So I didn't necessarily do my Martha challenge today. I was supposed to clean out my fridge and freezer. I didn't do that today because it's not really dirty. We just moved here recently and the house was professionally cleaned before we got here. And I wipe down the fridge each time I buy a big buncha groceries. I will go in there and get a few things rearranged, but there just isn't much for me to do. I'm antsy to get to my Six List (I read ahead!!)!!!

We didn't eat dinner out tonight. And I worked out this evening...double score for me. I will say that I sincerely doubt we'll go the whole month without having dinner out of the house. I will be SHOCKED if it happens. :) And I'm not sure what my realistic exercising goal is. I know I can't say that I'll work out everyday, because I'm just setting myself up to fail...big time. Ideally, I'd like to work out five times a week. I'm not doing anything too hardcore. 30 minutes of accelerated pilates and 20 minutes of belly and thigh busting cardio. I alternate between the two. It's a start and that's what's important to me.

We're heading to ikea tomorrow with some lovely friends of mine. I am definitely having friend issues right now that I can't discuss because it will take a ton of time to spill out and I'm not sure if this is the right time (though I feel like this is a great place since it's my blog that no one else but Tiffany reads). I just feel like though I can be taken as a pretty cranky person, I'm really kind of a nice person. I'm insanely loyal to my true friends. I'm pretty fun to be around. I'm caring and thoughtful. I'm crazy when I'm angry and my sense of humor can be pretty dry and mistaken for more of an attitude than I intended, but still not a horrible person. Just sometimes wonder why people don't consider my feelings. But anyway, I have super great friends that love me and I know they do. While I'm sad about some relationships, I can't tell you how truly blessed I am to have the friendships I do. Old friendships, new friendships, just down the road friendships, across hundreds of miles friendships, super close, tighter than sisters friendships, down for a good time friendships. I'm thankful and grateful.

Now off to browse through my most fave catalog......time to pick out some goodies!!

Weekly Menu (noooo dining out!!)

Just needed a place to write it down, don't think it will always be here, but anyway. My menu for the week:

Monday

Lunch: Baked Spaghetti, garlic bread, salad

Dinner: Grilled Steak, corn on the cob, baked potatoes

Tuesday

Lunch: Chicken and Rice

Dinner: Meatball subs, chips, baby carrots

Wednesday

Lunch: Sandwiches, fresh fruit
Dinner: Slow Cooked BBQ Pork Sandwiches, cole slaw

Thursday

Lunch: Sandwiches, fruit and veggies

Dinner: Baked Chicken, peas, baked macaroni and cheese

Friday

Lunch: Tuna Noodle Casserole, peas, applesauce

Dinner: Mini Meatloaves, mashed potatoes, mixed veggies

Saturday

Lunch: Sandwiches, fresh fruit

Dinner: BBQ Wings, baked beans, chips

*On days we have sandwiches for lunch, we also eat any leftovers in the fridge. Adam is my own food vacuum. :)

Day One of the Cleaning Challenge....check!

So I read my first day of 31 Days to Clean. I really like how the heart of the book is knowing your own heart and *why* you want to have a clean home. Like Sarah Mae says, it's more than just "keeping the roaches away." :) I'm supposed to write down why it's important to me to have a clean home. So here's why.

Ok, so there's so many reasons that it's hard to put them in a way that doesn't sound like a hot, jumbled mess of words and ideas. I'll try.

For my boys. I want my kids to have a clean, uncluttered home in which they can learn well, play well, live well, and *be* well. They can't play in a room that's a mess with toys, trash, clothes, games, and books. There's nowhere to play. I can tell right away if there's a clean space for them to play because they are quiet (errrr, sorta) and playing together. We can't learn in our school room if it's unorganized and chaotic (which it totally is right now. And I hate that.) We can be healthy and well if the house is a mess. And I want them to be proud of their home. I want them to be able to welcome people in with no hesitation. Shoot, I want to do that, too. You know, I'll turn on Hoarders and see these kids who can't have anyone over, ever, because the house they live in is so deplorable. My house has never looked that way, but I don't ever want my boys to feel like they can't invite people over because they are ashamed of our home.

For my husband. My mother-in-law is a VERY tidy and neat person. She and I have very distinct differences when it comes to our housekeeping. We love one another regardless, so that's a blessing. :) But it's very difficult for Adam to be at peace in our home because he was raised in a MUCH tidier environment. Cleaning is not something I enjoy. I don't love to clean, I don't like to clean, most days I'd rather not clean a single thing. It's a CONSTANT battle. I wish Adam knew how much I struggle with it. I mean he knows because the house isn't as clean as he'd like, but it's very much an internal battle. I wish I did LOVE to clean, this whole process would be much easier. :) He's unhappy, so I'm unhappy.

For myself. I don't want to be the wife and mom that can't keep a clean house. It's embarrassing and depressing.

Ok, so there are my reasons. I want to have a clean home for the people that live in it. We all deserve it and I need to put in the work to make our home the best it can be.

Bring on Day 2!! (I say that now, but I looked ahead and tomorrow I'm cleaning out the fridge. Ugh. :)

Day one: No dining out and I did my first workout (well, not ever, but in awhile.) Pretty stoked about both. No cheeseburgers taking up residence in my well defined muffin top and legs that feel like spaghetti noodles. :) Proud of myself for both things. Cleaning challenge starts tomorrow.

Oh and heard the news regarding Osama bin Laden. It's about time he was found and dealt with accordingly. It's been a long time coming, a day many weren't sure would come, but it has and he's dead. :)

So tomorrow is a new start for a lot of things. Here's my list (it's sounding very overwhelming to me tonight, however):

Start the 31 Days to Clean Challenge.
A lovely author Sarah Mae has written a book called 31 Days to Clean (I just blogged about it on Wednesday) and there is a great buncha women linking up to participate in a 31 day (sorta) challenge on working on our hearts to help us work on our homes. I'm going to participate, too, but we will only be "challenging" during the week, so we actually start on Monday.

No eating out for the month of May.

I've gotten lazy. Lazy about a lot of things and one of them is cooking. We are spending tooooo much money on dinners out. That's a big reason we are taking a hiatus. Another reason is because everytime we're out of the house, running errands, going to soccer, heading to the store, I hear a chorus of "Can we eat out? Where are we eating? McDonald's please!!" and I'm pretty tired of hearing it. So we told the boys that we weren't eating out for the month. Everyone is taking it fine now, but I know this will be difficult for all of us. Very difficult. After this month, my goal will be to limit our dining out to once weekly.

Mama has got to start working out.

Due to starting treatment last September, I have put on nearly 20 pounds. I currently weigh more than I have ever weighed not being pregnant. I'm so very unhappy with how I look and it drags me down so much everyday and in many ways. It's times like this that I'm grateful to have little boys. They seem less susceptible to body image issues....and I'm full of them. So I have to be consistent with working out. I pick it up and start and stop and start and stop and that of course yields no results. So I have to commit to making my physical health a priority.

Plus, we have to finish school this month. It's a lot to do and a lot for me personally to take on. But I know I'm strong enough to do this. I have to be. Mediocrity is no longer going to be acceptable. :)

I'm stoked!

Adisson was sick earlier this week. Started puking on Monday morning and didn't stop until early Wednesday morning. It was painful and miserable to watch him be so sick. Fortunately, he's better now and by tomorrow I think he'll be back to 100%. Buuuuuuuuuut, now Zander is sick.

It is going to be a long night for all of us....errrr, Zander and I anyway. Guess he can watch Royal Wedding coverage with me while we battle round 2 of Barfmania.

So my lovely bestie, Tiffany, told me about an e-book she stumbled upon today and I'm glad she did! The book is 31 Days to Clean - Having a Martha House the Mary Way. Tiffany already bought a copy and skimmed through it. She insisted it sounded easy enough to do (not like other cleaning challenges we've attempted and failed together) so I looked into it! I found the book on FB and saw that today I could receive the e-book for free if I blogged about it!

What is 31 Days to Clean?

Journey with me for 31 Days as we get our homes and our hearts in order. Give me 31 days and I’ll give you not only a cleaner home, but a vision for one.

I am not a natural when it comes to cleaning. In fact, sometimes I think my DNA is allergic to it! However, I know that if I am to care for my home, and more importantly my family, I need to persevere in creating a clean, peaceful home environment (not a perfect one!).

31 Days to Clean is about the “why” and the vision and the heart for taking care of our domains. Each day I encourage you with some thoughts and ideas, and then we put those ideas to action.

After each days reading, you will be given two challenges:

• The Mary Challenge -Something you do that encourages/engages your heart
• The Martha Challenge – Specific cleaning tasks

Friends, 31 Days to Clean is a faith journey towards ruling, subduing, and loving. We are forgoing perfection; we are choosing life.

I also saw that there is a big 31 day challenge starting May 1st through May 31st! How perfect! We aren't planning any out of town trips, Adam should be home for the month of May (I am much more likely to accomplish a cleaning task when Adam isn't away for work), this will be great!

Tiffany and I are great motivators for one another (well, we each cheer one another one, but we each personally lack the follow through!) and knowing there will be others that are participating in this super great challenge will be an even better incentive for us to get it done!

So, if you are interested, buy the book, join the challenge! Tiffany and I will be cleaning right along with you!!