Do you know that feeling that you get when you are about to puke? You just feel it welling up inside and you know you just have to be sick to make it go away. That's how I feel.
He can't be gone. Like, how is it possible???? I just welcomed him home a year ago. I don't want to do this again. I don't want to be alone again, I don't want to raise kids by myself again, I don't want to do this again. I want off of this horrible spinning nightmare. I don't want to do this. I don't think I can do this. I want my husband home.
How can I make it all go away? How can I make this be over?????????? How do I possibly get through another 450 days?????
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